I’ve been reading Bassey Ikpi’s book, “I’m Lying but I’m Telling the Truth.” Anyone who follows me on social media knows that I was initially taken by the title—thinking it would be about the lies Bassey told herself to survive. This got to me because it is one of the writing ideas I’ve held in my head for at least a year now, but have yet to put on paper or screen.

Thing is, Bassey’s book is actually about that; she says so within the first few pages. However, it’s also much darker than I anticipated, and yesterday, I realized that I may have to put it down for a beat. After a conversation I had with one of my trusted advisors, I was encouraged to go with my gut and manage my input.

Me: “But I feel it’s insensitive to not be able to read something that she actually went through.”

HIm: “It’s okay for you to put the book down. It’s okay to not finish something (editor’s note: not finishing is something I frequently beat myself up about). Sometimes you have to step away for your mental health. Especially when you’re like you are and want to feel everything—it’s like you want to feel the hurt.”

Me: “I’m an empath. It’s what we do.”

Him: “That’s a cop-out. Empaths are emotional junkies…”

Now while I don’t necessarily agree with what he said, I also don’t think he’s wrong. Empaths can be emotional junkies when we don’t learn to protect our energy, and set emotional boundaries. We do feel deeper than others and it’s because of that that it’s important we are mindful of what we allow in. Boundary setting and protecting myself is a point that he’d go on to make, and he’d end the conversation by, once again, encouraging me to put the book down.

So, I did.

I’m sure I’ll pick it back up because it is a fantastic book about a woman’s mental health journey (I encourage everyone, especially Black women, to read it), but I can’t in this moment.

And that’s okay.